The Blog
Anna Mathur talks about her new book, Mind Over Mother: Every mum’s guide to worry and anxiety in the first year
07
May
May
With it being Maternal Mental Health Week, I had planned to share a new special gift box, The Calm Box, that would support mums with their mental health. Unfortunately Covid-19 has delayed the launch of the box but I’m thrilled to tell you that there’s an option to include Anna Mathur’s new book, Mind Over Mother.
Anxiety is making motherhood a less pleasant, more fraught and pressured experience, and Anna, psychotherapist and mum of three, explains how to understand anxiety, why it affects you and what to do about it. With this book, Anna will make your mind a kinder, calmer, happier place to be and transform your motherhood experience by addressing your thinking. By sharing her journey, she gives you the confidence to reframe yours.
I asked her some questions about her book and here’s what she had to say…
1. Anna, tell us a bit about yourself.
I’m a Psychotherapist and mum of three living in Surrey! My oldest is 5 and my youngest has just turned one!
2. Can you share with us a little about your own experience with mental health?
I have experienced periods of depression through my teens and twenties. It was fuelled by a low sense of self-worth and being a perfectionist. I found the skills learned throughout my psychotherapy training invaluable for using on myself. However, everything came to a head when my middle child was born. He had acute, undiagnosed silent reflux and as a result, I was chronically sleep-deprived. I hit a real low. It was a turning point for me, highlighting how I needed to seek and accept support for myself sometimes, regardless of what I knew professionally. We all need other people, we all need to be vulnerable and accept support, even experienced therapists!
3. What do you love about what you do?
I love seeing people experience light bulb moments about their mental health. I love taking therapy outside of the therapy room, into Instagram squares and podcast conversations. It makes it accessible and approachable.
4. Congratulations on your book! How did this book come about and have you enjoyed writing it?
Thank you so much. I was approached to write it a couple of years ago. I wanted to tell mum’s that they don’t just have to accept worry and anxiety as part of the motherhood job description. I wanted to offer them hope that it didn’t have to rob them of their enjoyment, nor be another reason for them to lose sleep. My desire was to demystif anxiety and equip and empower them in addressing it. It was a long old process so it felt like an utter relief when it actually came to getting it down on paper (the keyboard!). I have a 4 month old baby and so wrote it in between feeds and over nap times. I can’t wait for people to get it into their hands.
Thank you so much. I was approached to write it a couple of years ago. I wanted to tell mum’s that they don’t just have to accept worry and anxiety as part of the motherhood job description. I wanted to offer them hope that it didn’t have to rob them of their enjoyment, nor be another reason for them to lose sleep. My desire was to demystif anxiety and equip and empower them in addressing it. It was a long old process so it felt like an utter relief when it actually came to getting it down on paper (the keyboard!). I have a 4 month old baby and so wrote it in between feeds and over nap times. I can’t wait for people to get it into their hands.
5. What’s your top tip for dealing with anxiety?
You are not your thoughts. You might not be able to control the thoughts that pop into your head, but you can choose what to do with them and dictate how much they impact you. Find some good tools that work for you, and keep using them. I time, you can disempower anxious thoughts, and reclaim the valuable headspace they have taken up!
You are not your thoughts. You might not be able to control the thoughts that pop into your head, but you can choose what to do with them and dictate how much they impact you. Find some good tools that work for you, and keep using them. I time, you can disempower anxious thoughts, and reclaim the valuable headspace they have taken up!
6. Do you have a self-care routine and what does it involve?
I have learnt over the last few years, that self-care is both vital to my own mental health, but also enables my family to enjoy me more! I am someone who is susceptible to the burnout roller coaster, so I use exercise, walking, conversations with friends and hot baths to refuel! It’s hard fitting it in, and sometimes I have to get up early or organise some childcare in order to make space to do the things that re-fill my cup.
I have learnt over the last few years, that self-care is both vital to my own mental health, but also enables my family to enjoy me more! I am someone who is susceptible to the burnout roller coaster, so I use exercise, walking, conversations with friends and hot baths to refuel! It’s hard fitting it in, and sometimes I have to get up early or organise some childcare in order to make space to do the things that re-fill my cup.
7. What advice would you give to any new mum or mum struggling with anxiety?
There is hope for you, it doesn’t have to be this way. You deserve to address your anxiety and find tools and support regardless of whether you believe that or not. Anxiety doesn’t have to impact your experience of motherhood. Reach out to someone close to you, or a health professional in order to take the next step.
There is hope for you, it doesn’t have to be this way. You deserve to address your anxiety and find tools and support regardless of whether you believe that or not. Anxiety doesn’t have to impact your experience of motherhood. Reach out to someone close to you, or a health professional in order to take the next step.
Thank you to Anna for taking part. I am delighted that Mind Over Mother: Every mum’s guide to worry and anxiety in the first year is an option in The Calm Box, launching later this month. You can pre-order The Calm Box here. Mind Over Mother by Anna Mathur is published by Piatkus on 14th May, £12.99.
Reviews for Mind Over Mother:
‘With conversations on Maternal Mental Health on the rise, and more women speaking up about the way they feel, Anna Mathur’s insight as a psychotherapist AND mother make her someone you feel you can trust. She offers little nuggets of gold while reminding us to point some of our kindness and love inwards.’ Giovanna Fletcher, bestselling author of Happy Mum, Happy Baby
‘Anna is a breath of fresh air – relatable, funny and wise’ Sarah Turner, bestselling author of The Unmumsy Mum
